Dodging Energy Vampires: An Empath's Guide to Evading Relationships That Drain You and Restoring Your Health and Power

As I stated in the title, this book had the answers to why I got into so many dysfunctional relationships. I am an empath and attracted narcissists and energy vampires!!! Wow!

It would be hard for me to distill down my journey toward realizing I am an empath into something that would fit in a review, but it's a journey that hasn't been easy. For the youngest part of my life I thought I was unlovable. Then I thought I did everything wrong, AND I was still unlovable. If people loved me, they'd care for me the way I cared for them... Wouldn't they? After I finally shed those lies, I thought my problem was that I had anxiety, and of course the first thing doctors wanted to do was give me medication that would "fix" me. My system is far too sensitive though, and the medications messed me up so badly I had to go off of them instantly.And the story goes on. Doesn't it for all of us? It wasn't until I turned to holistic medicine that I finally calmed my mind enough to tune into myself, and then myself in relation to the world around me, and only then did I finally realize I can sense energy, and that I have an energy of my own. For over a year now I've been reading and reviewing books about anxiety, thinking all the while that I was making progress, but I knew as soon as I saw this book that it would offer me something different, and it did!It gave me explanations for my life. It explained away the insanity. The feelings of exhaustion, confusion, and frustration. It made me realize I am not alone... there are others like me out there, a LOT of them... and I never had anxiety, or suicidal depression, and I'm not crazy. I actually was profoundly lucky to not marry an energy vampire. My husband normally has a very calm energy. He's relaxed, fun, and funny. (My energy vampires have always been, sadly, other wounded souls who have attached to me as their lifeline, and ended up sucking me dry.) But he doesn't believe in any of this, at ALL, and for far too long I've let his skepticism keep me from exploring who and what I am.Well no more. This book was amazing, and I can't possibly recommend it enough for anyone who wants to learn about empaths, or who suspects they are one. You aren't alone! You aren't crazy! Healing and peace are possible, and this book is the perfect place to start, so PLEASE don't miss it!!!

What a great book! The author knows what she's talking about and I read it with great interest. Re Read several chapters and sent excerpt to family member urging her to buy the book. This explains a lot of things in my life as well.

Some provocative ideas and lenses to look through regarding what I would call post traumatic patterns of making oneself safe by dominating others, or making oneself safe by being complicit with being dominated by others. The lens of the sociopathic narcissist feeding off the poor defenseless empath, while tempting for us empaths who have been spun and spun by those "vampires" in our lives is a lens that brings forward the polarities of us and them, judgment and characterization, self- righteousness and social violence, none of which I actually want to create in my life.I resonated with the notion of offering Divine love and not engaging in what domestic violence prevention folks would call the "Rescue Triangle" aka "Trauma Triangle" or "Drama Triangle" with people who are socially violent (vampiric) or dominating to me. However much of the book felt to me like it was being written within that consciousness of saviors, victims and dominators. And the only way out is out and she does talk about that part very well and gives great ideas and advice for certain situations along these lines. I think Christiane's languaging of her ideas is often spoken as assertions that assume the other agrees with her, or that there is only one valid interpretation- hers. Since I often actually see things a little different way- this was an experience of nah ah, at various points in the book for me. Value doesn't mean I agree with everything- still stirred some useful and valuable thinking for me.The notion that people who I do for that do not observe reciprocity in ways that feel balanced to me and throw tantrums when the answer is no do not suffer or spend energy thinking how to reconcile about these rifts in the relationship the way I do, has been a helpful idea for me. Allows me to just disengage with the attempts to please someone who remains displeased as a strategy of domination. My point is- its still worth reading just please do so with your critical thinking and unity cap also on. I don't believe we need more categories of us and them or psychologizing ways of coping with this very difficult and traumatizing world, nor pejorative disease or nicknames.In The Body Keeps the Score, Van Kolk discusses how trauma impacts brain function which impacts behavior and coping skills. He rightly points out that to discuss trauma without accounting for societal aspects that create or exacerbate it misses critical aspects of the topic. I believe we are responsible for our actions whether we are in a trauma reaction or not when we perform them. To discuss these trauma adaptations of "narcissism" as if people were born that way and that is the only self available to them to bring forward and that is who they ARE and the rest of us should just avoid them is a message I was left with that didn't feel authentic nor accurate to my own experience and interpretations.

I'm not sure why others find her personal stories offensive. They were very relatable. She is open, honest, real, and seemed sincere in wanting to help others heal. Having lost a great deal of my goodwill to vampires I felt this book to be extremely affirming and helpful. It's not me, it's them, but I have to take responsibility for stopping the blood flow. Thank you Christine for the wonderful suggestions on how to accomplish that and still be me.

This book was very useful and reassuring in its frank portrayal of people who don't provide anything in relationship but sustain them by means of manipulation. It avoided the victimisation of individuals who find themselves confused and isolated by these behaviours in its discussion of childhood wounds that create vulnerability and practical approaches to healing. This is simply written so very accessible and the style is like talking with someone familiar who has been through it, is open about her feelings and has your back. I would recommend to anyone who suspects imbalances at play in thier relationships and finds themselves doubting what the real issues are. Relationships that are draining you are taking more from you than your energy!

I could not stop listening to this book. The descriptions of different personality types was amazing. It was like light bulbs 💡 going off about different relationships in my life and why situations had happened and why I felt like I did about them. Christiane Northrups way of straight talking and getting to the point means you really ‘get the point’. Loved the book.

Whilst I feel this book contains some helpful advice for the more sensitive / empathic among us, and there are some helpful strategies for building boundaries and reflecting on the influence of parental figures and past relationships, please be aware this book is based on one individual's philosophy and not evidence-based at all.This is not an issue for most things e.g anti-vax views, guardian angels etc - as you can pick and choose what you believe in or take up on. However, the authors views on people who have been sexually abused as being due to what i can only describe as some type of 'genetic curse' is so hurtful and damaging it makes me doubt this lady's claim to have empathy at all.

The fact that we can feel drained by being around certain people or doing certain things is useful to know, but it's not a reason to stigmatise others as if they are vampires and evil. People rarely intentionally go around trying to drain others, being human is difficult, everyone has their challenges. I was surprised how lacking in actual substance this book is given that she is an MD, but then again, most Hay House books do seem to be lacking in substance these days.I'm further disgusted with the author's racist comments on social media, her lack of integrity since the pandemic began and the fact that Hay House do not seem to care about learning or speaking up about it.I will never buy a book by this author or any published by Hay House again.

If only I had had tg free benefit of this knowledge 12 months before, I could have saved myself and my friends and family so much heartache, and money after being tricked by an energy crab more aka narcissist sociopath. Great read.