See Me as a Person: Creating Therapeutic Relationships with Patients and Their Families

Even though I am not a physician, I found this book extremely helpful in learning how to be a better listener.The authors of “See Me as a Person” teach how to authentically connect with others in a meaningful way that allows you to provide them what they need to heal and thrive.The four parts of this connecting are: Attuning, Wondering, Following and Holding.ATTUNING is “being fully present with “this person right now,” attuning to who he or she is as a human being”. This involves showing by our body language that we are engaged and by removing any physical or mental distractions. Even the simple act of sitting down shows that we are intentionally present with this person and want to build a relationship with them.WONDERING is “suspending your conclusions as you ask questions and listen carefully for answers that make wonder an integral part of the relationships you build”. This allows you to walk this road with them and truly understand them. Rather than trying to fix the problem, truly take time to understand them and the problem. Doing so will allow for far greater insight.FOLLOWING is “following the cues you’re getting from the person in front of you, venturing into new inquiries based directly on both the verbal and nonverbal answers you’re receiving”.Most people daily drop clues to the things they love and the things that are hurting that they want to talk about. Following lets the person know that you understand and gives them an opportunity to open up to you.HOLDING is “metaphorically (and sometimes literally) holding the person in a way that demonstrates that you will do what it takes to safeguard the other from physical, mental, and emotional harm no matter what might threaten to interfere with your connection.” This allows you to build others up and give them the strength they need. Many times you may not fix the problem, but holding a person in the midst of the problem is all they want.People long to be seen and understood as a person, these tools helps us to treat people as people, “rather than as an obstacle or an object or a labeled category”. Seeing people as people allows us to truly minister to the whole person.

As I read through each section of this book, I immediately connected the insight, theory, and tools with my experiences in healthcare and with my relationships outside of the hospital. "See Me as a Person" is grounded in realistic, understandable, and powerful concepts that can truly change how you provide care. In my healthcare role, I experience the most volatile behavior from patients, family, and staff. This book provided me the concept of Wondering, which allows me to pause when responding to an angry person and discover what has made them upset. When I stop and wonder about the patient, I am able to respond from a position of compassion and peace as apposed to powering up with authority and force.I highly recommend this for anyone who works in healthcare, regardless of your position, role, or title.

Great book so far. I’m a caseworker for foster care and find the book beneficial. Some of it seems like a no brained, but definitely helps understand the mindset and why it’s so important to treat people as people even during high stress times. I’ll recommend to colleges most defiantly.

I bought this for my mom, who's a nurse. She already knew the concept, but still found the book interesting with some helpful tips and has mentioned things she's read in it numerous times.

This is an excellent text for health care professionals about how to be with and support patients. However, I am not in health care and still find it to be a very wonderful look at how to be with and support people in my life. The stories that are shared are great examples to help illustrate the concepts the authors are explaining.Michael Trout is also one of the authors.

The most insightful, engaging book (intended for the non-mental health professional) I have read on the subject of the caregiving relationship. Inspirational but also highly practical, and compelling. I'd like to see it required for licensure, for it, in my view, offers invaluable information that can help myopic nurses and other clinicians better appreciate how their responses impact the relationship.

The used version is in Excellent condition - very happy I ordered used for the price it is a great value. The book is a must read for anyone in healthcare, social services, pastoral services, hospice care.

This is truly the best book I've read in years. It is changing my life as a nurse and as a nurse educator. It is so refreshing and encouraging to be reminded that *everyone* can learn these skills and it doesn't have to be complicated. I will be weaving these ideas into almost everything I teach.