This Boy's Life: A Memoir

Have you ever noticed how, in the bleakest of controversies, there is, most of the time, a great hero waiting at the light of the end of the tunnel?This Boy's Life is exactly that: a story of a "Prodigal Son" who, after causing much harm to the society around him--with much harm having been done to him--not only became a better man, but also met a better life with his changed, saved heart from above!I'll compare the novel version of This Boy's Life to the 1993 film adaptation, starring young adult Leonardo DiCaprio as the book's author, Tobias "Toby" Wolff, a literature professor and, in addition, author of many other books and short stories. I saw the film before I read the book, which made both easier to understand, and I'll make sure I don't spoil anything for you!In This Boy's Life, we not only see most of the same scenarios presented in the film, but many "in-between" stories as well, not present for the film: Tobias Wolff's Catholic upbringing, and the impact it had in eventually reforming Mr. Wolff, after he had traded in his religion (not officially, but by means of being a non-practicing Catholic) for popularity--and authority--among his classmates and "friends": some of whom remained true to the end, and others of whom didn't. We learn more detail of his mother Rosemary's relationship with her stalkerish boyfriend Roy--how the relationship began, how it ended, and the details behind the chemistry Ellen Barkin and Chris Cooper shared onscreen: chemistry that was very profound on behalf of the two actors, but partially incomplete when it comes to restriction in detail that film knows, which literature doesn't. As Mr. Wolff reveals, his parents were divorced at a very young age, and his childhood was by no means easy, only getting to speak with his father and brother Geoffrey on very rare occasions (more as he became an adult) and dealing with the most mentally unstable father figures around him, including Roy and, more notably, Dwight: the monster Robert De Niro recreated for us on the big screen with his "tough guy" looks and personality, previously revealed beforehand in films such as Taxi Driver, Raging Bull, and much, much more.And it is in the telling of young Mr. Wolff's and Rosemary's relationships with Dwight that make This Boy's Life a page-turner--hard to put down when you have work to do and impatient to get back to when you're reading a part of the book that does not at all talk about Dwight. For me, the secret to this enjoyment was thinking of the DiCaprio-De Niro chemistry as Wolff-Dwight, and remembering what they have in common: they are both, next to Harvey Keitel, the most frequent moles of Martin Scorsese! Yet, their characters are completely different from one another--the former of which was not yet true of DiCaprio when the book and film were released.I give accolades to Tobias Wolff for the simple fact that, as the author, he makes the "two sides of the story" between himself and Dwight clearly and perfectly known. Dwight was, by no means, a man who deserved the benefit of the doubt: his ways of correction were very evil, as Mr. Wolff reveals in profound detail. However, Wolff himself was in need of correction, as a so-called "juvenile delinquent," and it is this so-called truth which makes the details of Wolff's relationship with Dwight so fascinating to read: we know both men were wrong, yet we're on Wolff's side--we empathize with him, because we were (or are) young and know what it means to succumb to peer pressure--and we know that, underneath it all, Wolff had a truly good heart, even if it was not necessarily applied. We all know who the hero turns out to be, which another plus to the true story is, and so we can enjoy without feeling guilty: we all know how it ended and, as one of my favorite Christian authors, Randy Alcorn, has said; the conflict we avoid in life is the same conflict we enjoy in story! Yes, in This Boy's Life; Tobias Wolff owns up to all his faults as a youth; and not only gives us a more honest picture of himself, but also a more honest picture of Dwight: a man who had a good intention in wanting to correct a young "juvenile delinquent," but went about it the completely wrong way, using passive aggression and even physical abuse to correct. Once in my life, I was a troublemaker teen, and I saw the same kind of "correction" from my own stepparent. For those of you who have been in the same boat with me, you know how it feels, and it is that same redemption--as well as hope--that prevails in This Boy's Life.I highly encourage you to pay close attention to the differences between how Tobias Wolff portrays his mother Rosemary, and how Ellen Barkin--at the screenwriting of Robert Getchell and direction of Michael Caton-Jones--portrayed her. I'll put in a fun fact to paint the picture I want to give you: before Ms. Barkin was signed onto play Caroline, Debra Winger originally had the part! If you've ***seen*** This Boy's Life, you remember how submissive Caroline was to Dwight, which makes it incredibly hard not to laugh at the idea of an actress outspoken as Ms. Winger portraying her: and to an actor outspoken as Robert De Niro! As Tobias Wolff himself presents, however, Rosemary, while submissive, was also quick to stand up for her young son Tobias (referred to as Toby), even if not all the time. Rosemary is another hero of This Boy's Life, and if you enter into the novel with the same foreknowledge I had before even entering into the film, I think you'll have fun comparing the two Caroline's we meet, one in literature and one in film.For those of you who yearn for a better life, and those of you who have already been given a better life (past the one you previously had), This Boy's Life is a book to read and to remember.

The young Tobias Wolff is not much of a protagonist. He lies, he cheats, he steals and never has a qualm about it even when caught. He has few redeeming qualities. Occasionally he is moved by someone's behavior, but for most of this book that covers approximately 1955-1961 he goes through adolescence without a rudder or a care. Mostly he seems dazed as he observes life from the wrong side of the tracks during a period most Americans remember nostalgically. His crimes are petty but many - dishonesty with himself and others seems to be his central trait. He longs for a better life and gets a chance for one when he lies his way into consideration for a scholarship at a prep school. His main antagonist is his step-father Dwight who is a completely unsympathetic character once he gets past the courtship phase with Wolff's mother. This is a very arid book emotionally although it rings true and is beautifully detailed and manicured. The book seems as aimless as its protagonist, but it is also a page-turner due to Wolff's wonderful narrative and descriptions of people and place. The details are not particularly about the period - little mention of the music, TV, movies, events, trends, and toys of the times but it does evoke some of the period's own duplicity where "Father Knows Best" lulled those of us who lived during it (I was born the same year as the author) into hiding from the more tragic families many of us lived in. I liked the book yet it leaves me numb, uninspired and wondering who is this boy at the center of this book and what was the point of it?

Tobias Wolff's memoir is about a boy's search for his true identity by trying on a number of personae. The reader also gets some interesting insights to his divorced mother and her complex personality. Tobias starts his journey to self-discovery by demanding that he be called "Jack", not Toby, because Jack sounds more macho, more like a guy, or even a dangerous rake. His mother Rosemary seldom forbids Jack anything; and when she tries to put her foot down, she's overruled by the loser men in her life, most notably and comically pathetic: Dwight. Jack tries every role from juvenile deliquent to cigarette-smoking, gambling Boy Scout. No kidding!The book is a page-turner without the cheap thrills, unless you count his sneaking home from school at around age 11 to "play" with the.22 one of Rosemary's boyfriends gave him. He aims at people on the street with the empty rifle. The game is no fun with an unloaded rifle, so he gets his ammo and is back to the apartment window aiming at people below.This is my second read of the book which I selected for an American Lit student studying memoirs. I'm sure this one has very high interest for all ages.

Not finished it yet - I'm saving it. So far the narrator and his mother are equally cowed by dominant father-husband, who comes over as a psychopathic bully and egotist. In a melodrama he'd come to a sticky end, but this is more or less non-fiction, so I'm hooked to find out if said male chauvinist comes a cropper in the end.Finished it and ready for the re-read:Wolff, Tobias. This Boy's Life.After watching a truck plunge over a cliff, Tobias Wolff begins the story of his boyhood: `It was 1955 and we were driving from Florida to Utah, to get away from a man my mother was afraid of and to get rich on uranium.' The memoir is replete with such unfulfilled promises of happiness and riches, for this boy's life is far from happy and successful. In fact, although `people in Utah were getting up poor in the morning and going to bed rich at night,' sleeping rough, going to poor schools, and suffering a thousand humiliations is to be the lot of Toby, self-christened Jack, after Jack London.Jack's major problem, however, is being terrorised by the psychopath Dwight, the `man my mother was afraid of.' Already a scoundrel, given to theft, window-breaking and taking pot-shots at people in the street, Jack is obviously in need of paternal discipline. This is provided - and how! - by his mother's latest suitor, Dwight, a divorcee with three children. Dwight emerges as a humourless control freak.Living with Dwight and family in Chinook, a town without a school is `A Whole New Deal.' The first instalment of this is Dwight's confiscation of Jack's Winchester rifle; the next is finding him a paper round, and the most arduous having him shuck horse chestnuts every night, the promised remuneration from papers and nuts ending up in his guardian's pocket. The Winchester too now, in effect, belongs to Dwight, a boaster who can't shoot for toffee.Eventually, by fair means and foul, Jack manages to escape from the dreary school at Concrete by winning a scholarship to Hill, a private school, into which he is initiated by being measured for a wardrobe of uniforms. It begins to look like an upbeat ending for the scapegrace hero, but being Jack it isn't to be. Conformity and a settled life are not for him.What I liked about Jack's story is the calm unemotional tone maintained as he and his mother constantly move from one disaster to another, from Florida to Utah to Seattle, ending up in the Cascade Mountains of Washington. My only cavil is with the ending, in my opinion just a couple of pages too long. I'd have preferred it to end with the reunion of mother and son in Washington DC, when she takes him `to a piano bar full of men in Nehru jackets where she let me drink myself under the table. She wanted me to know that I'd lasted longer than she ever thought I would.' All Jack needs in life is his mother's approval. As for her, `she was in a mood to celebrate, having just landed a good job in a church across the street from the White House. "I've got a better view than Kennedy," she told me.'

The honesty is remarkable. Wolff's childhood was hard and rebellious. He shows us how he survived it. I'll read more of his books.

Good condition. Great read. Good value for money.

Great

A very interesting story which is well worth a read. It came to my notice as a result of watching the movie of the book.