Being Genuine: Stop Being Nice, Start Being Real

Eye opening, great communication advice, easy to read and to put into practice. I keep on referring back to it over and over, since most of our everyday problems with others are due to lack of communication or miscommunication. The author will give its readers tools to practice how to better communicate your needs and expectations so others don have to “guess” what are your needs. Recommend 100%

If good communication is important to you, this book is a must. The principles of empathy and authenticity that it advises are excellent; so many of us get empathy wrong and do comparison (I had something like that happen to me .....) instead.A lovely book, based on the principles of non-violent communication.I'd also recommend "Don't be Nice, be Real": Balancing Passion for Self with Compassion for Others which is also based on non-violent communications.Plus, Bonds That Make Us Free: Healing Our Relationships, Coming to Ourselves or Leadership and Self-deception: Getting Out of the Box or The Anatomy of Peace.: Resolving the Heart of Conflict are also great reading and advice on authentic communications in all areas of life.

Very good book. Glad I bought it.

When applying empathy in our communication we have 3 options:- Listen to others with empathy- Speak to others with empathy- Self-empathyThis book starts with the self-empathy stand and explores from that angle the empathic (nonviolent) communication towards others (by listening and by speaking).Thomas D'Ansembourg does an excellent job here to go beyond the "it-looks-good-on-paper-so-it-must-be-good" phase and explores and suggests ways to ingrate this method in our daily thinking, relationships, business and social context.Empathic communication or nonviolent communication (NVC) is the opposite of the judgmental style of communication. And this judgmental communication style is something most of us have been brought up with and use in (work) relationships. The main issue with this judgmental style of communication is that it results in a loss of connection (within us or with others) and therefore results in a loss of authenticity.The NVC communication model based on 4 steps gets covered in detail (Ref Marshall B. Rosenberg):- To observe, without judgment, analysis or evaluation- To express feelings following up on this observation- To express the needs connected with these feelings- Making a request (towards ourselves or towards the other person) such these needs can be met within reasonThe nice element of this book is also the focus on authenticity itself and the (self-empathic) way of getting a more authentic person, therefore the subtitle "stop being nice, start being real". It is in part autobiographic as Thomas describes his own experiences in becoming more real and this through honest and "real" communication towards himself and others.Highly recommended!Related suggestions:- Words that work in business, a practical guide to effective communication in the workplace (Ike Lasater)- Non violent communication, a language of life (Marschall B. Rosenberg)ContentsPreface - Moving from being nice to being genuineIntroduction1 - Why we are alienated from ourselves?2 - Becoming aware of what we are truly experiencing.3 - Becoming aware of what others are truly experiencing.4 - Creating a space to connect.5 - Emotional security and meaning: Two keys to peace.6 - Sharing information and our values.7 - MethodEpilogue - Cultivating peaseHow to use the NVC processSome basic feelings and needs we all have

I have read only a few pages so far but what I read was amazing. The insight and the understanding blew my mind and as I am currently trying to learn and put into practice the NVC, I have found it reinforces my learning and provides me with a greater appreciation of this incredible language.I want everyone to read this!!