Paris, Je T'aime [DVD]

There are twenty arrondissements (districts) in Paris, but this film chooses to showcase eighteen of them: eighteen "little neighbourhood romances". The nature of those romances stretch from a mother for a child to a vampire for her (willing) prey, as eighteen directors present short five-, six-, seven-minute films about their appointed district in the Capital of Love, all strung together in a seamless flow.Some directors I already know; some are new to me. Some try something new, whilst others follow well-trodden paths. Thus Gurinder Chadha explores the melding of different cultures; Gus van Sant portrays a humorous gay pick-up; Joel and Ethan Coen provide a comic take on Paris's romantic reputation; Walter Salles looks at the city from the view of an immigrant nanny; Tom Tykwer looks at the uncanny; and Alexander Payne sees both the funny and sad sides in everyday experience. Who's missing? Well, it would have been nice to see the likes of Michael Haneke or Patrice Chereau make contributions, but I'm not complaining.Such short films do not allow for much detailed characterisation, of course, but most are nevertheless satisfying in themselves, short vignettes of what may have been full-length feature films. Most of the directors also wrote their screenplays. Some directors play the game in a standard manner; some adopt a more quirky (Coen brothers) or even surreal approach (Christopher Doyle). There's even one with husband-and-wife mime artists, both corny and comic at the same time and certainly the one that made me laugh the most.And it's more often the case that each arrondissement's tourist hotspot is not depicted as the backdrop to each romance. Whether this was done to avoid cliché or whether the plotline of the story had no need for the city's leading sights to intrude is superficially explored in the DVD's twenty-five-minute `Making of' extra, but the film itself still manages to feature the Eiffel Tower, Pere Lachaise, the Montparnasse Tower. It's a shame, though, that no scenes are set on the city's bridges.It would be difficult to argue that all eighteen of these films could not have been shot anywhere else but in Paris, yet it is also true that most - through either visual or verbal means - would look confusing or out of place if shot, say in London instead. In that sense, this film really does possess and communicate some of the multiple personas of Paris. Consequently, anyone with a love for this city will probably like this film.

Ideal, I thought. Too late at night to start watching a whole film, I'll just see two or three of these instead. But, just like biscuits, where you can't have just one, I ended up eating the whole packet. More than two hours later (documentary and trailer included) I was still there, so be warned.But being addictive isn't the same as being good. A few of these eighteen short films are frankly terrible, some are adequate, others clever and two or three properly rise to the occasion. As there are so many of them I can't be bothered for the purposes of this review to go back and find out exactly who did what but here are the stand-outs, and my surprising conclusions.Firstly, I remember the directors Gus van Sant, Wes Craven and the Coen brothers for all the wrong reasons. Their films are appalling. My first-year classmates at film school would have done better than that, even the ones that never made it to the second year. The proselytising of Parminder Nagra is likewise simple to the point of mundanity. And then you have all these stars clearly enjoying their school trip to Paris: Bob Hoskins, Fanny Ardant, Nick Nolte, Steve Buscemi, Ben Gazzara - but what were they all thinking? Only the splendid Natalie Portman and Maggie Gyllenhaal are amongst the few that have done their homework and as a result properly shine.So what's to like? Well, actually quite a bit. Christopher Doyle's film is startling in its originality, as is the tender and heart-stopping piece about a mother grieving for her young son. Likewise the sweet-to-sad love story featuring Portman properly grasps the five-minute format like few others and shows a care and thoughtfulness that brings a smile to your face. The final film, perhaps the best, builds with a poignancy that is a joy to behold in its economy; seldom have five minutes of celluloid been as gripping, life-affirming, funny and sad all at the same time. This one, together with the others just mentioned, do in fact make the whole endeavour well worth the price of admission.Little need be said about Paris itself; we all know it's gorgeous. But the cinematography here is quite superb, glowing and pulsing with interesting colours so that even the turkeys (see above) come out looking far better than they deserve. Though it does make me wonder that given production values as good as these maybe me and my film-school mates could have rocketed to stardom after only our first term.

So, what do you need to know - that there are 18 little vignettes, each about 5 minutes long, each by a different director and using different actors, and each one referring to a different area of Paris.Just like with a box of chocolates, some people hate the toffees, some people hate the nutty ones, and some people hate the soft cetres. So, everybody will have a different view as to which of the vignettes they prefer - some may prefer Nick Nolte's or Steve Buscemi's, maybe Elijah Woods' or Natalie Portman's, perhaps Juliette Binoche's or Fanny Ardant's; there are many well-known French actors involved and just as many non-French. There many different styles and stories so there are certain to be some you like more and some you like less.Something you do need to be aware of is that there are just little 5 minute glimpses, so if you want a three act play you're going to have to do most of that yourself. Often what you see is a turning point, that after this things will never be the same. However, it might just be a moment from an ongoing situation, just an illustration as to what it's all about.And now the DVD will cost you less than a fiver - you can't really go wrong.