Out of the Fog: Moving from Confusion to Clarity After Narcissistic Abuse

I love this book. I could not put it down. I loved that it was in available in kindle form as I could read it with my Narc husband in the room and in the car and it just looked like my nose was just in another book. Meanwhile, i was validated and empowered by this book in a million ways and i found this book at the exact right time that i am planning my escape for healing and safety. At the exact right time, i will ask my teenage girls to read this book, not only to better understand their fathers behavior but to actually educate them on what is a normal relationship, to listen to their instincts, and set boundries for friends and boyfriends and be aware of manipulation-ships. I get the feeling as an abuse survivor (my father and my husband) that i've modeled what NOT to do and this will help me communicate to them the difference. To the author, Dana: Bravo and Thank you. So well done.

Great subject and presented in a thoughtful way, but the number of flat out editing oversights is dizzying! Please before publishing a second edition, have a professional proof reader go over the entire text. The message can be lost in the errors.

I'm only about 30% done with this book, but my Kindle version is already HIGHLY highlighted yellow already! I sure wish I had this book way back in high school. The book is not only relative for people who have come out of abusive relationships, but also for teenagers learning about friendships and romantic partners. I will never understand why so much time is spent in school, making us memorize historical dates and other information that we really don't need to lead an emotionally healthy life. And no time is spent teaching us about healthy and unhealthy relationships. So much behavior that I've accepted from people who I thought were my friends were actually abusive and toxic. I just had no idea! I hope with all the knowledge that Dana has downloaded into my brain (I watch her YouTube videos each week too), I will be able to teach my children what healthy relationships look like. Dana has taught me about having boundaries and relationship deal-breakers. I never ever had these in the past and this made me a prime candidate for an emotionally and psychologically abusive relationship. I now realize I can keep myself safe from abusive and toxic people in the future and I have the power to keep bad people out of my life. I can walk away. It's empowering to now know what unhealthy looks like!

This book is an amazing resource for anyone who thinks they might be in an unhealthy relationship. Although the author's first book, "Start Here" was excellent, I think this book is even better! In any relationship (and more so in an abusive relationship), people can blur the lines between what is healthy behavior and what is abusive. This book clearly defines these "lines" by showing what behavior is abusive in a relationship, including differences in the following concepts: Commitment vs. Codependency, No One Is Perfect vs. Tolerating Abuse, A Person Acting the Part vs. A Person Actually Changing, Going Through So Much Together vs. Being Put Through So Much By Them, and much more! This is an eye-opening and immediately useful book, and I highly recommend it! Please mark if you find my review helpful. Thank you so much!

Dana is authentic. She helped me navigate through the FOG back in March 2017 when I finally figured out what had been done to my mind by an abusive demon. (I disagree with the author here. She calls these demons, humans. To me, they are still demons in human form.)I will always be thankful to Dana. She has my support unconditionally as she has been part of my own personal freedom from pain and abuse.

I’m in the aftermath of an abusive relationship with a narc. No contact. My second relationship with an narc. My last. Dana knows her stuff. I love her YouTube channel, and was a bit worried that this book wouldn’t have more to offer than what her channel offers, but it does! Highly recommend this one. And if you haven’t checked out her videos on YouTube, they are a must. Dana is so calming and very intelligent and has helped me so much in recognizing the abuse, making the decision to move out, break up, go no contact and I’ve been experiencing true freedom for a little over a month now.

Dana explains very well about dealing with a narcissistic person and their impact on you. Best of all she inspires you with guidance to recovery.

Fantastic book from Dana Morningstar...Dana has personally guided me out of the fog, through her online videos explaining narcissistic abuse...and now with this book....you can come further out...through recognizing the behaviors alone that truly put you in the fog in the first place....Fear, Obligation, and Guilt, can not only put you in an emotional fog, but cause you to feel so 'sunk' over time, around a person that 'traps' you with these emotions....Dana is a guiding light here...leading you out of the fog, by recognizing just what the heck the fog is....

I adore this book. "Out of the Fog" investigates thought holes--erroneous beliefs surrounding abusive circumstances and trauma--and sets a light on how society often unwittingly encourages dangerous thinking. Most sections are presented clearly in a "thought hole vs truth" structure, and all are followed by at least one experience or thought from individuals who have experienced such issues.As a survivor of many forms of abuse stemming from childhood and reaching into adulthood, I had already come to 98% of the conclusions touched on here. I've seen how acceptance of them have aided others in my life too, so I am confident in their validity. I was, however, disappointed that the negative aspects of hypervigilance were not explored. Obviously, a sufferer or survivor should not feel guilt in drawing lines and creating boundaries. This is true *even if they DO "miss out" on certain healthy people*. Saying a good relationship or friendship will always be there, waiting, no matter how slow you need to go, is simply not being truthful. Life is not so black-and-white. Yet, missing out on something viable due to practising an attitude of safety and personal sanity is far from the end of the world. And I'm sure Dana Morningstar would agree, despite the absence of this in the book.Small caveat to the above criticism: I am autistic and sometimes intentions in words are lost on me. Perhaps I read the tone in a way you will not. My advice would be to not put down the book of you feel anything is missing, as it could be that it is brought up in a later section. I'd also say you should check out further information on hypervigilance and even C-PTSD from compassionate and trustworthy sources, as additions to this book. (I picked this up because I thought it might be linked to the "Out of the FOG" website).A couple other reasons for the .5 deduction in stars are motte technical and nitpicky. There are typos, grammatical errors, and unhelpful repetitions which, if this book were given another edit, would be picked up on easily. The extent of these issues isn't enough to mar the effectiveness of the words.I'd say "Out of the Fog" is definitely aimed towards sufferers/survivors and that if you read this from a standpoint of inexperience, you may actually unduly decide it is hysterical at points. While the book could prove invaluable in showing friends and loved ones the realities of a sufferer/survivor, anybody seeking to open the eyes of those around them might do well to evaluate the words and people a bit beforehand. This is a dive deep into uncharted territory for many, though much of it may seem obvious to you or me, so... careful. The book doesn't hold back and others may balk at parts of the contents.I feel refreshed after finishing "Out of the Got". It is further validation to me in regards to what I've come through and what I've decided is acceptable to me in my life.

I absolutely love Dana Morningstar and her work. I listen to her live chat (recorded on Youtube) here in the U.K. every Thursday morning, which without I would be totally depressed. I've been so confused in the past thinking what the hell is going on here, then to discover after her reading her books - see her other book too - Start Here (need to read first) - you then realise, nearly all of your inner circle are narcs and when you have a lot of narc's in your inner circle it's so easy to think - it must be me, I'm odd man out. Now I just watch and observe and .... not absorb like I did in the past. One other thing about Dana she's a totally sincere and genuine person, a lot of what she does is free of charge in order to help other victims of narcissistic abuse. Her books are definitely a must read.

If you ever find yourself in the situation where you have been abused, think you are being abused or know someone who might be going through this particular type of trauma, this book should be your first point of call.To begin with, it's important to know that there are many different types of abuse, and when it comes to the less obvious ones, such as emotional or financial abuse, it can be particularly hard to pin down.The often subtle and creeping nature of being deliberately deceived by someone else results in a vulnerable person being in a constant state of uncertainty and denial, sometimes for a long period of time. Being manipulated is confusing, difficult to recognise and hard to believe, especially if it's coming from someone close to you or a member of your family. It's hard for anyone to believe a person could be capable of doing such a thing which makes an abused person feel even more isolated, frightened and alone.This is what many psychopaths or sociopaths delight in doing to those they think are weak or stupid, and what many narcissists very often can't help doing to anyone they see as a threat. There's a subtle difference between the two, and Dana explains this so well in her life-saving book. She explains the circumstances that lead to abuse, the different types of abusers and abuse, how easy it is to be manipulated and trapped in a vicious cycle of love, punishment and control, how to come to terms with the resulting feelings of denial, hurt and shame, and how to overcome the trauma when you believe there is no hope left.Whatever the situation, there is always hope, and understanding the situation is the first step. From there, and with Dana's help, you can start the healing process to finally move on and live the life you truly deserve.

This book his been an absolute godsend. Anyone who has been a victim of narcissistic abuse should read this. Dana has really dug deep and you can tell she has experienced a cluster b personality. She also has her trademark sayings(whether she's aware or not) crazy making and it's "so lifetime TV movie" I wish I could hug this lady as she really "gets it" I highly reccomend the book. I think she's a psychiatric nurse and this could be her first venture into writing? Please give this book a chance. 5 stars.

I received the book today and I have started reading it straight away because of all positive reviews I've read about earlier. And I must say the first chapters are really an eye opener. Makes you realise that you are okay and you just need to reconsider your surrounding, and spot negative behavior at the right time. I am very keen to finish the book and I am sure there will be so much more to learn from.