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K**R
Everyone should read this
Rape culture is real and we live it everyday. There's no reason why people should be treated like this but it's a reality that we face everyday when things can go viral and spiral out of control and no one wants to take responsibility for not standing up for what's right and instead just doing what's easy. It's easy to turn your cheek and not get involved and not say anything because you're afraid that you'll be attached to the same incident,the same crime and maybe become a victim of Rape Culture yourself. Maybe you're afraid that you'll also be labeled but just think of the person who's going through it, they've brrn labeled and they're going to be labeled forever and they cannot escape it, they can't turn the other cheek and and pretend it didn't happen. It happened. It's happening. This is real and rape culture is part of everyday life. People need to acknowledge that rape is real and when someone says they were raped, they have in fact been raped. We as a society should nor be deflecting with our language saying: "Oh, they believed they were raped." No it's a fact someone was raped because a rape occurs when someone says they were raped. It's not a question of what they were wearing, who they were dating, their social media, and what that picture portrays, what their Instagram feed looks like, what their Twitter comments are, what their Facebook has on it. The victim is often more investigated than the rapist and that's part of this Rape Culture our society is so beholden to: there's no victims just people who are "asking for it". It takes a brave person to even say, "Yes, I was raped." and to go to the police and to see Justice for it. That takes an immense amount of Bravery to come forward and put your face out there and say yep that was me and this happened and it's real. And to have to go through the justice system and have your whole person just ripped apart and examined for "slut" behavior it's like the justice system is trying to put you back in the box just tell you it's easier if you can just accept it and move on and pretend it didn't happen or get therapy you need so you can figure out how not to feel the way your feeling because we don't have any evidence, or we don't have enough evidence, besides your word versus their word to say whether or not you were raped unless that other person admits it. And if they dont well then it didn't happen because we don't have enough evidence. Did you ever think that at the justice system would work if people were confident enough in the system itself and not being shamed in the process of seeking Justice that they would come forward immediately after a rape happens? So tgey dont have to be afraid to come forward because of all the repercussions that come from that both from our justice system and the way it treats people who are victims of rape versus how they treat people who are accused of rape? Especially if the rapist ispublic figure then it's a whole nother type of "investigation" it's not a real investigation it's: we're going to probe and we're going to "see" if any of that your statement is "valid". It's all this very light language and non accusatory language because we're we're Society that bows to the Rape Culture and doesn't want to admit that this is a growing problem and it's something that you really need to pay attention to. This book is definitely something that doesn't shy away from all the factors all the perspectives, inluding having to see your rapist everyday because no one believes you, and even having no one believe you; and then you start doubting yourself: nope you know I guess it didn't happen, you know I guess I was wrong, and if I just admit that I was wrong then you know I don't have to go through you know the ridicule every single day. If I do what's easy and recant then it would be easier for everyone. It's easier for everyone if they didn't know that rapes occur. It's easier for everyone else but it's never going to be easy for you. You have to do what's right for you and not necessarily what's easy or especially not what's easier for everyone else. Thats why I love that theme throughout this book the right thing is never the easy thing to do. If you think you're doing the right thing by hiding this away and not telling anybody please know you're doing what is easy because if you hide it away and don't say anything it's easy for everyone to just pretend rapes don't happen. No matter what you do you can't forget it. It never work when you have that Rape Culture mindset of "as soon as they forget it I can forget it too" but that's not how it works. Everyone should read this book it has so many underlying themes that are applicable to all different sides of life for different times in your life; different perspectives that really observe people in our society as a whole and the rape culture that were currently perpetuating.
J**N
Rape Culture Realisticly Depicted
Some boys say yes, while the girls say no.This book hits straight home with all the sexual assault and rape and sexual harassment happening in this day in age. It accurately depicts what rape does to someone and how it affects how everyone sees them. It shows how rape hurts the victim in a way no other crime can, by blaming them.Grace wanted Ian long before she was raped by Zac. But, because Zac claims she's a slut and he happens to be a golden boy football player that everyone loves the entire community turns their backs on Grace. Hassling, pushing, hitting, calling her names.Throughout the story you try to feel comfort in the thought that this isn't a true story, that none of this happened and you're reading this as a work of fiction--but that's not true. This does happen, it's in college, high school sometimes now even middle school.This is what rape culture is and what it will do. This is the very meaning. Ultimately Grace never changes peoples minds until she speaks up, even then Ian is forced to pick a side.Without any spoilers it's hard to say much else. It takes evidence of the crime to prove that she was indeed raped.The way I read it made me very frustrated. I started to feel like maybe she was actually lying in the middle because it was so complicated and I was feeling for Ian. I don't think this is wrong, infact I think the entire point of the book is that Ian had to accept what happened and deal with the consequences of doing the right thing, not the easy thing.It's about the person who was there after the rape and tried to reason with himself about what he saw. He tried to cover it up, even forced himself to believe she got what she wanted, pushing them both further apart.Its a love story, but it's an honest one.In the end, Ian doesn't believe Grace because of her pain and suffering, it's because he is forced to see the truth about Zac with the evidence of the crime that he finds.Hardly anyone believes Grace until Zac's mask is lifted.It's all too true.I have a friend who was raped and I see so much of Grace in her. She's tough, but so soft underneath it all. She's scared by large people, teachers and men who could hurt her. She flinched and winces and it's all true. I see it in her.Rape isn't done by a monster with a dagger or a rope most times. Most times it's done by a friend, a coworker, a classmate, a peer, a family member, a family friend, a boyfriend, an ex-boyfriend, ect.I think everyone should read this book, because I feel more awake then I ever have about this topic. I only wish I could do something to help my friend and the millions of other women out there going through this.It's not your fault.You are not alone.
L**N
Lauras_Book_Addiction
"Talk to me when that guy hears you tell him no, hears you but waits while your head spins and your stomach churns, wait until you fall over and then pounces and tells you nobody gets to say no to him. Talk to me when he takes your clothes off and shoves himself inside your body and your limbs are too numb to stop him. Talk to me when he leaves you there, alone, unconscious, and bleeding and then puts pictures of what he did to you online. Then you tell me about your reasons."A unflinching look at rape culture at its worst. My heart bleed for Grace and everything she endured at the hands of not only her rapist but her so called friends and everyone from school. I honestly was so shocked by their behaviour and sadden that this actually takes place and probably the reason why rape victims don't come forward for fear of not being believed and victimised. Ian, what can I say about him? I loved and hated him in equal parts.The ending was satisfying, but Grace is way more forgiving than myself.
A**M
Toxic
So normally, I don't sit down and write reviews. But with this I felt like it something needed to do.While I appreciate the author's effort to take upon something so emotional and captivating I really was not a fan of this book.I liked the strength that Grace showed throughout the bookI honestly did not like Ian at all. I truly believe that he used the fact his opinion mattered to her to make her feel horrible about herself. I hated the that he was the one who took her to the hospital and yet still didn't believe. Despite everything he encountered he still was easily manipulated by his friends. It bothered me that he was more worried that fact his best friend his crush rather than his best friend raping his crush.
C**E
This made me really uncomfortable
Warning: there are spoilers in this review!!!Ok...I think that the author was genuinely trying to write something about attitudes towards sexual assault changing in one school, and that reflected the doubt that victims are sometimes faced with...but I don't think it's been achieved. In fact I think it makes excuses for some really dangerous attitudes far too often, and for too long.The "hero" of the book just seemed like a self serving idiot most of the time. For example, he's torn between his best friend, who believes he is innocent, and Grace, who is pretty clear on the fact she has been raped by aforementioned friend. In one of these moments, feeling a bit sorry for himself and the situation he is in (already selfish, somebody else was raped which tops your mental anguish...), he's thinking "Why do girls not get that there's a fine line between looking good and asking for it...it's like people who leave the doors unlocked and then cry when they're robbed". Erm...victim blaming much? In another scene, he sees some of his buddies harassing and groping her. So presumably he reports them straight away right?! Erm, no...he valiantly stops them, but then later pretends to have seen nothing of this sexual assault. Am I meant to like this guy? Throughout much of the book, he seems more bothered by the fact his friend slept with her before him, rather than that she has been raped. What a catch.I also don't think this book is that well researched. Some evidence pops up, which after some unnecessary faffing gets handed to the authorities. It's a video, of the rape, with the girl saying no, the rapist clearly hearing this but paying no attention, and assaulting her. The police imply this isn't good evidence. SERIOUSLY?!? If you can't convict on the basis of video evidence, and presumably whatever they found at the hospital, what can you convict with?I worry this book might actually put off anyone who has been raped from reporting it, instead of demonstrating the strength of the main character, which I think was the aim. If I didn't know better, it would definitely make me stay quiet.
K**R
Where to begin... it's fabulous!!
When I but a book I look at the other reviews it gets and frankly they weren't too great but I thought what the heck.I loved this it's hard hitting, considers everybody's angle. I loved grace and Ian, I cried and laughed with both it's just FAB!!!!!!Yea the topics unusual but it needs to be read, I'm long out of high schools but this still hits me hard, makes me consider views across society and I'll be rereading this soon :)
S**Y
A real eye opener!
This book tells the story of a high school girl named Grace that was raped by a popular boy at school. As you read this book, you get a glimpse of what it's like for rape survivors when they report their rapist and the backlash and bullying they face from peers, school administration, students and family members. It's a truly difficult book to read because you really sympathize with Grace and you practically feel her pain. This book shows you exactly why it's hard for rape survivors to report their rapists and what happens after they do. I definitely recommend reading this book!
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