Family Ties That Bind: A self-help guide to change through Family of Origin therapy (Personal Self-Help Series)

This book is written in an easy-to-read style, so if you're looking for a first-crack at Bowen family theory or Edwin H. Friedman's "Failure of Nerve," this is a good place for a layperson to start.Richardson goes through how families link on an emotional level in ways that might surprise readers (well, it surprised me, but then I've been neglecting my reading on sociological/psychological/human behaviour). If you're going through some family craziness, this book might be of help.Toward the end, Richardson recommends a years-long process of interviewing family members in a non-confrontational way so as to help the interviewer (you, presumably) understand how your family functions and how it affects you. The interviews are not an attempt to 'fix' your family, but to fix you. It's a good idea, because you are the only person you can really change. Others might follow suit, but that is up to them.Would I go through that process? I'm not sure. I come from a geneologically obsessed family, so I already have a good idea of the origins of my quirks, however, I tried out some of this on a family member recently and got some very surprising and frank answers. It helped me understand the dynamics from her end of the family a lot better, and with understanding comes some compassion (instead of fear and annoyance) at the way another family member treats others.Of particular interest is how our absent family members affect us - whether they are absent because of estrangement, social distancing, death, adoption or abortion. Hey, no one is going to want to admit the aborted baby affects their family dynamic, but believe me, the absence of that nameless person is still felt, possibly more so because it came about by someone's decision, not by the random-ness of accident or disease.And so, it's a good read, but don't look for a cure-all. Richardson focuses more on your family as a book with un-ending chapters to be read.

This is a great book to better understand yourself and your family of origin. Each short chapter has questions for reflection. You will get out of this book what you put into it. It takes time to write and reflect, but it’s worth the insights

I bought this book as a recommendation from my counselor to help me work through some family issues. I was raised in a home very different from the way that I have chosen to be as an adult and I was reflecting very poorly on my family because of the way that they raised me. This book helped me to see my family members as well-meaning and loving people doing the very best with the information that they had, in the context of the society in which they grew up, and at the time in history that they found themselves in. I cannot recommend this book enough! Buy one for yourself and anyone that you know that is having difficulty with their family!

Interesting to read. Gives clarity about family dynamics. I will need to read it again to really focus on all the questions we must ask ourselves. But a good read overall.

Since this was my first exposure to the ideas and concepts behind "Family of Origin Work" I did find the first half of the book useful and easy to understand as an introduction to this type of thing - although if you're already familiar with the ideas and concepts of "Family of Origin Work" it may be too basic for you.I found the second half of the book - on how to actually process and deal with these family issues - much less helpful. The author stresses that YOU are the one that needs to change (and I agree) - yet most of the suggestions involve going to your family members and asking questions and interviewing them. It just seemed to contradict itself - YOU have to change so go talk to THEM. When it came to actually making your own independent changes to become a more differentiated person I found there really wasn't any insightful or helpful suggestions.It's sort of like the author does a good job of saying what's gone wrong and perhaps how it went wrong - however there's not much info on how to actually do something about it. Overall I feel it's severely lacking the information that's needed most.

This quick read has many helpful explanations of the causation of family of origin relational problems. The specific questions are geared towards self-examination and seeing yourself in the family of origin model to help you gain an understanding of your own and other's character traits, sickness, poor communication, stunted growth and more. This book is great in conjunction with a family systems therapist who would lead you to our Father God who has provided everything we need in his son, Christ Jesus. I also suggest for immediate help with teenagers: Age of Opportunity: A Biblical Guide to Parenting Teens, Second Edition (Resources for Changing Lives)

This is a good basic book on family systems. People will find what they need, both in understanding why it's important and in practical help in working on selves by seeking greater understanding of where they fit and how they react emotionally within their own family systems.

I really enjoy reading this book, especially the exercises it offers. This book is very easy to read, even for those who aren’t studying counseling or psychology

Not quite what I was looking for as it didn't address my issues.

A useful read.

Really good book. You'll learn how to create a genogram, and how to better understand yourself by reflecting on your family of origin. Take it slowly, and do the exercises as best you can - they're sometimes really painful.Heads up, don't put yourself back into harm's way by attempting to re-engage with abusive family members while you work through this book. Just do your best.

If you have absolutely no exposure to the ideas that family patterns can influence your daily life, this book can potentially provide you a bit of an introduction to that. However, it's sexist, judge-y, and features ideas that have been disproven by real science, including a whole chapter on Birth Order and how it influences your personality.Richardson actually spends an entire paragraph (p 85) whining about the one star review here on Amazon, by the way. (I guess that review was from a previous edition.) Not even kidding, he says "the reader, clearly a middle child... felt the 'unfairness'" of his ideas. Well, I'm not a middle child, but I've got to agree... when a book says that women of almost every birth order should work for a man, and that if you're the older brother of sisters, you'd be a much better gynaecologist (seriously, that's his top career pick for this birth order) than, say, a youngest sister of sisters, who would be better off as secretary... but since she's just so "flighty or unpredictable" she needs "an older man... to guide her in using her capabilities" and be her boss... well, when a book says all this, yeah, that's pretty unfair to women everywhere!But, it does teach you how to make a genogram properly... so it's got that going for it, which is nice...(PS, I bought this book because I took a course for which it was required reading.)

I ordered the book recently since it was one of my school text-book requirements! I was so curious to read the part that talks about "middle child" since I am a middle child. NOT a single word of it was accurate about myself, and I was so surprised by the fact that the author was too obsessive about his book that he mentioned one of the Amazon feedbacks in this part and he judged the reader as "obviously being a middle child "! DISASTER! Guess who needs to do some self-work! SMH...Then turned to read the part about the last child and no single words were accurate about the last child too! So I closed the book, called the Amazon customer service and ordered a return!