The Good Daughter Syndrome: Help For Empathic Daughters of Narcissistic, Borderline, or Difficult Mothers Trapped in the Role of the Good Daughter Paperback – March 8, 2023

My mother is a malignant narcissist. I have never read a more important book on what has been going on and how to deal with the massive amount of trauma she has inflicted on me and is still inflicting on me. This book has empowered me. This is an eye opener. Straight forward and to the point on many pain points. I never realized the silent stranglehold contracts that were bought into by me. I just knew that something was terribly wrong. So buy the book and get out a highlighter. You will not regret it. BIG kudos to the author. You are helping the lost who have nobody to turn to.

I am happy to see the other outstanding reviews for this incredible, unique, necessary tool for healing (finally!) and not sure if I could ever possibly do this gift of a book justice but wanted to try. There are no words to adequately express my most sincere gratitude for all of the blood, sweat, tears, and life experience that went into writing this incredibly helpful tool for so many daughters out there.If you were drawn here and even think you might need to read this-please do not pass “Go” and pick this up asap. You will most certainly get way more out of it than you could have ever imagined. The weight off of my chest and heart was gently but tangibly lifted with each page, and having almost reached the end, I am inspired to use my newly developed strength and feelings of empowerment which filled in the places that used to contain low self-esteem, guilt, and shame-to pay it forward and embrace every other daughter who needs such healing right now.Thank you from the bottom of my heart, Dr. Fabrizio, for sharing your wisdom and your own challenging experiences of coming out the other side not only intact but shining brightly while so eloquently helping your readers do the same.Ditto to every positive review on here and I concur that this book will change your life-for the better.

I've had a "disfunctional" relationship with my mother my whole life - yet, never clearly being able to see what exactly was/is going on or if I'm the crazy one and essentially unable to break free of the hold she has on me (these core belief systems go deep) all the way into middle aged adult years no matter what I've tried (which has been a LOT!) From being put into therapy at age 12, told I was the problem my whole life, trying to be the "good daughter" then going through eating disorders, rebelling and moving out of state at 18 (which of course horrified my mother and family), doing everything I could to break free of old family patterns and live my life - yet, still attracting disfunctional relationships and never feeling free to fully be me (but not knowing why.) Fast forward to moving back temporarily (thinking I had healed enough and would be fine), then familial difficulties arose from my father's unexpected illness to my parents divorce which brought estrangement and left me as the only family member staying with my mother. After moving in to help her, my health deteriorated to the point of being unable to work and it was like living in the same toxic cycle from growing up, yet worse.. The guilt and shame was constantly brought up as having left her for so long and missed Holidays, but given mixed messages of her wanting me to be happy and continuously denying her part if I ever brought it up, is much like living in a spin cycle. At a complete loss from all I've tried to break free and ultimately feeling as though I'll never be able to get free of her. I began having insights into the brave unknown that I am not crazy (for the love of god!!) and how she puts her shame onto me (I know she has childhood undealt with traumas and doesn't intentionally want to do this.. which of course my empathy for her - which she denies - keeps me stuck in feeling sorry for her and responsible for her happiness..), yet I couldn't make any sense out of it. I did a search online out of desperation for healing while living with toxic mothers and came across Katherine's website which floored me! I immediately bought her book and read it within 2 days. I underlined, highlighted and put exclammation points on just about every page! I couldn't believe that finally someone was speaking truth into what I've felt my whole life. This is a topic very few want to discuss. Some of the scenarios were not exacts, but everything added up and I was keenly aware of the voice in the back of my head that my mom would be so upset if she knew I were reading this... hence the power of the "good daughter syndrome!" I am still soaking in the truths of Katherine's experience. The fact that she came out and broke free herself of a toxic relationship with her own mother is incredibly inspiring as I know the depths of how hard this all is (especially with master mother manipulaters who cover everything up so well that you don't even know what's happening!) I hope for the opportunity to work with Katherine one-on-one at some point. If anyone that's reading this is looking for help, answers or clarity to break free of a "seemingly" toxic maternal relationship, I HIGHLY recommend buying this book. You will not regret it, as it is life-changing material.

I wish I had had this book thirty years ago! It is transformative, freeing, life- and mindset-changing. Katherine brought to light and verbalized many of my unspoken thoughts and experiences and revealed and explained to me what I never understood about them. She enabled me for the first time to experience freedom while still respecting and loving my mother, not stirring up animosity toward her, but rather compassion and understanding. Beautifully done!When I went to a counselor years ago, she told me to read the book Boundaries twice and do the workbook. I did. And still, I found myself unable to really confidently set and keep them. Katherine revealed the core problem and shed light on what I never saw, which finally dismantled my inability. I feel set free. This is what I’ve needed someone to help me understand for decades.So, so, so many things in the book resonated with me. I needed someone to do what Katherine did - describe what was not normal and healthy and what ways my response wasn’t healthy for me either. I’ve spent decades making sure everyone in my life is ok. I am so thankful to God for this book that has transformed my thinking, given me permission to be my authentic self, affirmed that is ok, and given me strength to realize mom is responsible for herself, and I am responsible for me. And submission and enmeshment, betraying myself to protect her need for superiority, relevance, reassurance, and recognition isn’t right or healthy for either of us. Love in truth and honesty about us both - which I didn’t even understand before.The insights and helps this book gives are unparalleled by other resources that say set boundaries, be yourself, etc., but don’t enable their practice by addressing and untangling WHY we struggle to do that in the first place. Thank you, thank you, thank you for this!